Fear of the Ordinary

By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS Published: January 26, 2005WASHINGTON, Jan. 25 (AP) -

Education Secretary Margaret Spellings denounced PBS on Tuesday for spending public money on a cartoon with lesbian characters, saying many parents would not want children exposed to such lifestyles.

The episode of "Postcards From Buster," which has not yet run, shows the title character, a bunny named Buster, on a trip to Vermont, a state that recognizes same-sex civil unions. The episode features two lesbian couples, although the focus is on farm life and maple sugaring.

A PBS spokesman said late Tuesday that the nonprofit organization had decided not to distribute the episode, "Sugartime!," to its 349 stations but that the Education Department's objections were not a factor in that decision.
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Some parents won’t want their children to see this, the Secretary of Education warns. They shouldn’t have it thrust on them by public television.

I don’t have that dubious luxury. My six-year-old son has already met our gay neighbors here in my humble abode in suburban Sacramento, California. One household serves as the holiday social center of the cul-de-sac. At one party he met a little boy whose parents lived in the area and return to see the hosts, their friends, around holidays. It’s nice to be able to bring families together so the kids can meet new friends, isn’t it?

Opponents of gay relationships can’t stand seeing gay couples seeming, well, ordinary. Yet those of us who live and work with our fellow Americans in same-sex relationships note every day that they’re, well … ordinary. The homes are neat, some are nicer neighbors than others, and by and large they’re, well, ordinary.

And that’s what motivates the scare among so many. The fear of ordinariness. That gay couples dare to look and act just like any other couple, except for the configuration.

This isn’t new of course. Bigotry generally builds on fear of difference, which translates into all kinds of fearsome mental imagery. I have a Mormon acquaintance who tells of being asked if it’s true that Mormons have horns. And aren’t they all really polygamists?

The most powerful weapon against this kind of silliness is the basic ordinariness of most folks. Most black folks don’t want to beat anyone up, just a good job, nice home and good schools. You know, like the white folks. As housing and job segregation breaks down, more white folks see how ordinary most black folks are, and the invisible walls start to break down too. That’s why, I think, there’s such fear of ordinary gay folks. We’ve seen where such ordinariness leads too. Acceptance.